Friday, March 19

and maybe I'm not up for being a victim of love

...when all my resistance will never be distance enough. -anna nalick

So we won't discuss my dinner last night. It wasn't the healthiest choice. I wasn't caring. Let's talk about love instead.

There was once a time when I was the sum of all the romantic characters I saw in movies. I believed in this concept of romantic love, and I saw it in my future. I even advocated to my friends how important it was. However, after enough heartbreaks I reevaluated that position. I do not like the person I become when I'm in love, I lose myself in it. And it always ends in pain. Never mind all the fighting and aggravation to be endured. I was always afraid of ending up alone, but I think there are some overlooked merits to being alone.

As a society we are pushed to couple, to march 2 by 2 onward towards the expectations of marriage and kids and pets, and even we gays are no longer immune. I'm just not feeling it. Maybe I'm jaded, but love rarely lasts long enough to be worth it.

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